 |
| Photobypexels.com |
We hate to admit it, but most of us are experts at avoiding discomfort. The moment an awkward feeling creeps in, we’ll do just about anything to push it away. Some of us scroll endlessly on our phones, and others bury themselves in work to avoid an uncomfortable conversation that’s been brewing for weeks.
It’s funny actually, if you think about it, the effort we put into avoiding a feeling often ends up being harder than just sitting with it. Yet here we are, becoming professional escapists while the real trick is simple(learning how to sit with the uncomfortable feelings).
Uncomfortable feelings are, well… uncomfortable. They bring up shame, sadness, anger, guilt, and vulnerability. None of these are fun. Nobody wakes up and says, “You know what I’d love today? An hour full of insecurity with a side of regret.”
So we resist. We tell ourselves, “I’ll think about it later.” But later turns into never! You see, that awkward thing you didn’t say, or that truth you’re not ready to face it doesn’t vanish. It just lingers in the background until it finds another way to show up, sometimes even louder than before.
We often avoid tough conversations like telling a friend they hurt us, asking for clarity in a relationship, or saying no to something we don’t actually want to do. Instead of facing it head-on, we distract ourselves. We overeat, binge-watch shows anything but actually feel.
When you sit with a feeling instead of pushing it away, you let it complete its purpose. Example, you let guilt show you where you may need to repair, and sadness? Let sadness cry its tears. And then, eventually, the feeling goes.
Next time you feel yourself reaching for a distraction, scrolling, snacking, chasing the high, or scrubbing the kitchen sink for no reason, try to ask yourself what you're really avoiding right now. Maybe it’s an uncomfortable conversation, maybe it’s admitting you feel lonely, maybe it's guilt, or maybe just maybe, it’s the fear of failure. Whatever it is, give yourself a little courage to sit with it, even for a few minutes.
And don’t worry, it might feel weird at first, but more than that, it makes you honest with yourself. And honesty is far lighter to carry than all the effort of running away. So yes, uncomfortable feelings aren’t fun. But neither is endlessly distracting yourself. And between the two, at least one leads to peace.
And who knows, you might even find that the feeling wasn’t as terrifying as you thought. Kind of like realizing that the “monster” under your bed was just a shadow from your chair.
Do you feel distractions give you relief, or do they simply push the real issue further away?
I’d love to hear from you.
Thanks a bunch for sticking around.
See you next time, bye!🤎